I Feel Bad For These Guys

Shimmer

Because Averi perfected that style long ago.

It's not a very good picture, but he won't stop moving. Anyway...Charlie 

Closet Ray Liotaphile

Just woke up, and I had a detailed dream about Ray Liota. I was at some conference in an older government building. It was getting ready to storm really bad outside, and for some reason me, and a Hispanic and black chick were there together. At some point during the conference, someone who was killing people then bringing them back to life with no memories, and then cloning them, starts shooting. I look around and realize all the people there were clones. Then some stoner picks up a gun and starts shooting, and it turns out this stoner faction was warring with the clones faction.

Amidst the cross fire, Ray Liota gets one of the dropped guns. He was on the counsel, and proceeded to shoot and kill just about everyone else there. I grabbed a gun off the floor when I realized it was him and ran up to him and had him autograph it.

He thanked me for being such a good friend and fan, and for standing up for him when he got killed off in some movie. I put the gun in my pocket, but noticed the ink was already fading. The shooting eventually stopped and the conference continued.

The black chick and Mexican girl also had a presentation during all this. The Mexican girl was doing a demonstration with the other girls help, and had to draw on her face with permanent marker. I remember laughing in my dream, because you couldn't see it very well unless you were close to the front.

At this point suddenly it was part old government building, and part newish bookstore.

When it was done I went up to the panel and was talking to him. He mentioned the only way it would get any crazier was if he, I, and his mother were here. I laughed and seemed to understand in my dream. He said he likes coming to these things because he likes it there, and the buildings are safe from really bad storms.

I was going to ask him to sign my gun again, but we were late to go eat. I caught up with them at the door, and asked them if they had seen my shoes, because I was barefoot all this time.

Then I woke up.

It's a Boy

Yesterday we went and got my mom a new kitten. She is calling him Charlie, because the women at the shelter said he looked like Charlie Chaplin. Personally, I think it's a Hitler mustache.

I'll post picks later, time to go yell at Star Ocean some more. Dun Dun Dun DONK!

Won't Fall For It Again

In your honor, I will get ripped off tonight.

I sold some CD's today and bought two new ones with the credit. I got Days Away, which has been on my list forever but I had never seen the CD in a store. I got it, don't remember where I heard them, but I like it.

I also got the Foo Fighter's new CD. After reading so much good, I thought, "It can't be that bad." Sigh.

Without taking any risks you become stale with music. And since Foo hasn't taken any, and continue not to take any, I won't be buying any more music from them unless I see drastic changes. I hate safe route albums.

But with Foo, it's the risk you take. Their singles are full of energy, and generally fantastic musical pieces. It's just the albums usually have three or four songs. A couple singles, and then one gigantic song that spans the rest of the CD making my head hurt.

They tried releasing a double album this time. Disc one is faster stuff, and disc two is slower stuff. Correction. Disc one is the same filler shit left over from their last CD. Disc two is a pretty crappy attempt to be folksy, because there is only so much variation you can do when you only know four different acoustic rhythms. Note to Foo, you can make electric slow music too.

Splitting all of the slower stuff and faster stuff on their own CD's was a mistake also. Normally when you listen to an album, pacing can make a big difference between good and great. Since they are split though, pacing does not exist. I would have been ten time happier had they cut out 8 of the filler songs and just released a well paced 12 song album.

I didn't expect it to be the worst CD I'd get today. Each of the CD's drone on in their own right so badly, that I got a headache on the way home. I couldn't make it past track seven on the first disc. Oh My God, somebody throw a pie!

Wax on, Wax off 

Liquid Pain 

Have You Seen an Ant Eat It's Own Head?

Well now I have. I thought I'd seen or heard just about everything I was going to hear from Black Lab. The once or twice per year rationing of their music just wasn't enough, and I felt as a loyal fan that they were holding out on me.

Then an update. They have a new site, and when I visit, I'm greeted by See the Sun. The full CD at long last. I've known about it forever, but they were trying to get a label to support them. I got angsty at the fact that they wouldn't release it to us directly.

I'm listening to it now. I ordered the day I found the new site. It was luck that I checked them, because in the past year I've checked only a handful of times.

The CD is wonderful, but they rationed it out for so long that it takes away from the presentation slightly. I don't have that whole new CD feeling with this album. It's really more of a compilation at this point with a few new tunes. That's fine by me though. I hate listening to EPs, because they are done so fast and I get tired of them quicker. This way I can put it in and keep it in along YBAM longer.

This may sound like rambling but I'm excited. Waking up to new album from one of your favorite bands is a wonderful feeling. The link is in my side bar.

And yes I know the Anberlin link I down right now. The whole website is down, so I'm hoping it'll come back up and the tab will work again.

This is my favorite of the Pictures. I mean come on. We could not be any more awesome if we tried. 

So much of note in this picture. It was the house on Myrtle we lived in, as you might be able to tell from the trash on the floor. Not just any trash, food trash, which is the best. Crap piled on a speaker. Hunter and Lutrell. And best of all, my Playstation 1, turned upside down on the ground because it wouldn't work any other way. 

Hunter's infamous mexican tan. 

Hunter and I enjoy a slow dance at prom. Later that night, sodomy. 

Josh Looking at Adult Oriented things. At least I assume so. Notice the monitor is the same one I have now. It has lasted me 3 computers. 

Check out that poster behind me. It was fake 3D. Also I'm holding a basefootball bat as my genitals. Also, notice the ribbons.

While Hunter sleeps, I attack!! With sausage from the looks of things. I still have those shorts. 

Mike Miller and I, REALLY, liked each other. I miss Mike too. It sucks we just kind of grew apart after high school, because he was one of my best friends in those years. 

Stuart and Stardust. I miss em both. 

Sheena and I on the floor of the house we lived in on Myrtle Street. As you can see from the trashy couch and nappy hardwood floor covered in garbage, we were livin' la vida loca! 

Unexpected

I got something today that I had assumed for years was gone. I've bitched and complained about it, often. I woke up to a big box in my room, but I didn't order anything.

I opened the box confused, trying to figure out what I had ordered that came in such a big box. After 2 cuts of the tape I realized what it was. Jo sent most of my stuff back. There aren't any of my CD's she took, but most, is not all of my pictures are here. My graduation gown, a box of old checks, and my senior year yearbook, were all inside.

I'm going to be posting a lot of these pictures over the next couple days or so.

El Dia De Papa

Today was Father's Day. I woke up and went straight to cooking my dad Enchiladas. It took about two hours hand rolling them and everything, but they turned out delicious.

Spent a while after that organizing my favorites folders. I have all of my music links condensed into one master folder with sub-folders for different categories. I had a band site saved for the band Umbrellas. Little did I know, they are the current project of the guy who was The Lindsay Diaries. I recognized his voice and checked the singers and I stumbled upon happy. Needless to say I ordered the CD.

Family Guy and American Dad tonight. I'm going to start a Final Fantasy again soon, I just haven't decided which I'm going to play. I have it narrowed down to IV, X, or X-2. Maybe even X followed by X-2.

My mom wants to get a new cat, but she doesn't wan to bring any of our wild ones outside inside. I'd honestly like to steal the Orange kitten from Sarah, but it isn't my choice. She wants one that has been inside before and won't be a pain getting house broken. The ones outside wouldn't be, but she can be stubborn.

I think I'm going to order one more CD right now but I don't know which. I may just get the newest Foo next time I'm in town.

--Edit

I ended up ordering Adelayda's CD. Their website is, by all guesses, completely gone. CDnow only has a few copies left, so I felt if I was going to get it, now is the time.

Four Three Three

Still here.

Did you know an Owl's ears are at different heights? Sound reaches them at slightly different times and it helps them pin point where the prey is. It's amazing the life changing knowledge you can learn in the wee hours of the morn.

I'm going to try to sleep again soon. The problem has been stopping my minds constant dance on things I can't get away from. If only I could lay down and be swallowed in a veil of teddy bears cooking Spanish desserts for Jesus and his band of decorating marsupials. If I had any artistic talent I'd be trying my best to recreate that exactly as it looks in my head.

The microscopic pads on a gecko's feet, have the sticktoitedness(the guy on TV said it so it's real) to lift two thousand times its own weight.

Three Three Three

I got tired of laying in the darkness trying to sleep. Sometimes when you can't get results you just have to stop, go back and try again later.

There's a Lindsay Lohan video on right now for her new Herbie movie. She is so skinny now it makes me sick. She seriously looks unhealthy now, and her figure is gone.

The Foo Fighter's latest single was on before this and it sounded good now that I actually listened to it from start to finish. Damn he says the line, "getting the best" a lot in it though.

I've had a hard time sleeping since Bitty died. I lay there in the darkness and I expect him to walk into my room and meow. He doesn't, and then I'm left in the dark unable to think of anything else.

Gavin Degraw is on now. He is part of a genre I've been trying to name for a while. I usually just call it fake piano band, elevator with no soul music. But I really think it should be something shorter, because that is way too much to say when I'm mid sentence talking about how shitty the music is.

Hmm, Girl's Gone Wild. If you are the type of girl who takes her shirt of when someone says, "I have a camera," then I hate to say it but you are a stupid whore. No, I don't hate to say it, I was just being nice. Now go swallow five cocks whore.

Cosby Show, Trigun, Infomercial, Infomercial, Infomercial.

Tonight is not a good night. On a good night you can roll over at 4am and turn on your TV and find something to watch. Last night I watched Blade 1 & 2. Tonight, I settle for whatever is on Animal Planet. It's almost always better than anything else anyway. Well, unless that shitty pet trick show is on hosted by Slater.

I played Kirby's Canvas Curse for a while tonight. It's fun and did not dispense urges to throw stuff like jak 2 or DDS.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have announced their engagement. Downgrade.

Tonight was Justin's wedding. I received word he wanted to talk to me a few days ago, but it's kind of insulting to hear you are invited through the grapevine. Never the less, I didn't go, but I hope he and Karla have a long and happy marriage.

August is shaping up to be a great month for music. So far it looks like Cold, Our Lady Peace, and 30 Seconds to Mars will be releasing new albums then. Blue October, and Abandoned Pools might as well, but it hasn't been finalized yet.

Gavin Degraw is "tikerjibs" music. Because of their existence some more deserving band will break up and become music store clerks.

I have an urge for a sammich. What kind you ask? I'll tell you. I want to see Green Day sammiched between a firing squad, and a gang of lonely prison men on Viagra.

Loss

I'm having a hard time with this. Every time I get my mind off of Bitty, something brings him right back up. I went into the living room a few minutes ago and seeing my dad laying there on the couch without Bitty against his chest, was heart breaking. He was 11 or 12, I'm not sure which. For our pet history, he had a pretty short life. Twinkles was almost 20 when we had to finally put him to sleep, and Bitty was taken far too soon.

He was more than a pet. And I'm sure all pet owners say this when theirs dies, but he was an amazing and special cat. He was part of the family, and he was one of my best friends.

It's been very hard on my mom so far. I've said it before that I didn't know how she would handle it if and when she lost Bitty. She's been medicating herself through it so far with Zannaks(sp?). I know it's not the healthiest way to deal with loss, but I don't know how she would even function without the pills right now. Bitty was her baby, as much one of her children as I am.

Picking him up from the vet, already in a box, but still warm was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Knowing he was alive just minutes before, but that now I would never hear "mowwowowoww" the same again. He'd never crawl into the cabinet with the cat food and sleep behind the chocolate syrup again. He'd never crawl into my Dad's arms and sleep against him like a baby on the couch again. He'd never lie on my bed and sleep while the warm breeze blows into my room.

I remember before his surgery when he would come into my room at 3am and wake me up because he was hungry. I'd be sleeping and he'd wake me up and I'd be irritated and tell him not now. He'd keep meowing and finally I'd get up and give him a can of cat food. Last night while I was laying down trying to sleep I glanced at the door and swore for a second I saw his shadow reflecting off the poster just inside my room. I knew it wasn't possible, but for a brief second it was like he was saying goodbye.

I miss you Bitty.

Bitty Died Today

He went in for his surgery, and the vet found out it was cancer. We had him put to sleep because it had spread throughout his head to his jaw and he couldn't open his mouth anymore. I don't feel like going into anymore details right now.

Saving us Like Ashes

I started this post, but I don't really know what to write about. A lot of stuff has happened.

Korey came down, and flew home yesterday.

Bitty has surgery tomorrow on his eye again. Every time things look better, something happens and they get worse. The vet here is a crock.

The Grey Kitten ended up on the roof today, and he fell asleep. His eye gunk dried while he was up there and he couldn't see. I had to get him off the roof then pin him down and clean the gunk from his eyes with a wet wash cloth. He stopped fighting me once his eyes were open again, I guess it was mother cattily........Because that's a word.

I got Digital Devil Saga and it's fucking infuriating when I fight normal enemies and on the fourth wave they suddenly use an "instantly kill everyone in my group" ability. Walls were almost punched.

Bought a dart board while Korey was here. It's pretty fun even though we haven't used it in four or five days though. It was cheap, but is very entertaining.

the raccoon has babies. Four of them to be exact. She brings them over at night to eat the cat food outside. They are cute, and they can climb straight up the brick on our house. Crazy ass wild animals. We're going to have to call some kind of pest control soon because we can't just let raccoons make this their home.

Go Spurs!

I am paying a penance for eating Taco Bell yesterday. Needless to say, my toilet has leveled up 5 times today off the random encounters I dropped into it.

I won't be on messenger much over the next few days, and I won't be answering my phone or visiting anyone either. After being in the same room with someone for a full month straight, some elbow room and time to myself is much needed.

It was great to have some alone time to myself last night. Twice.

Shit I'm bored.